Disappointed in myself!

If you’re a Stripper Notes loyalist then you know I’m in school and I’ve been doing so well! But yesterday I got lazy and missed some assignments and it really has me down because it brought my grade from an A to a B and I don’t like that. I want A’s! I can’t believe I slacked and thought I had all the time in the world to do these assignment, but I’ve also been cranking out videos like crazy on my Youtube channel and I’ve been enjoying that. The semester is ALMOST over and I can’t give up now! I have to push thru and be the best that I know I am! I am made to win and I will not lose! I have all the power I need to get these A’s and finish the semester strong! I’m not even going to get myself down about the B because as long as I know I worked hard and still willing to work hard that’s all that matters. I just wanted to brag to people that I made all A’s but screw that! I’m an independent woman who pays all her own bills, takes 6 classes and is smashing them all, makes videos, sells merch on eBay and loves the world! I am still sad, but I am no longer disappointing in myself because everything happens for a reason and I’m still proud of my accolades. 

Its hard when you have such high expectations and they are not met, but hey that’s what growth and trying is for. If we were all perfect we would be very bored. I love being this mess of a work in progress because my growth is a light and it shines me in the right direction. We fall down, we get back up. We get our hearts broken, we fall in love again. We go broke!, we increase what we lost by 100!

I have high hopes for the end of this semester and all in all I have to be happy with what I’ve done. Not many 24 year olds are as independent and responsible as me and I love that about myself it’s really self fulfilling and being in school is like the diamond ring of my life right now.

When I took that year off last year and danced I was drinking a lo and my life had no direction. Now I feel a sense of purpose and I am so happy. I have nothing to be sad about and when I look back on all the things I allowed to cause me pain I feel no more pain because I chose to be happy even when I didn’t know what that was.

Thanks for reading, love you guys and girls so much *smooches*


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