I know this world has always been an unfair place and women are often dealt the short end of the stick, but there are many bad things that some women bring on themselves. Yes I am a stripper, but I wouldn’t even sleep a single customer let alone a married one. Bad things are going to happen to all of us in life, but I highly believe that when you are a good person and treat people the way you would like to be treated karma will be in your favor. That is actually a natural law of life. When you are on an honest path honesty follows you like a charm, but when you behave like a snake the snakes will follow you. Women who sleep with married men often say that is not a position they want to be in and even say they want to get out lol. Girl you were never in.
Disclaimer this story is not to bash only to inform and enlighten.
I have a close friend who dances with me. I met her at a previous club and I respect her to the utmost. She’s smart, beautiful and unapologetically black which I love. We also have lots of discussion about men and we go back and forth about ideas sex & relationships. I’ve made mistakes in my past, but one thing I’ve always been uncomfortable with is men who are married. Being in a relationship is one thing, but marriage is a whole other issue to me. I’ve heard her mention this guy just randomly and I thought it was nothing, because that’s how she made it sound. She would just casually say that she has a guy friend who is married and she knows he loves her, but he’s married and is tired of his wife. That’s all well and fine, but you know that he’s married so I feel like if he isn’t going to respect his marriage don’t make it easy for him to be unfaithful by just offering yourself up. At this time I literally just thought they were friends so I didn’t care. I’m a stripper I’ve met tons of married men, but I would never want to be with any of them because I don’t want to cause another woman pain. She now tells me she had sex with him and it was nothing she just wanted some sex and he gives her money, fixes her flat tires blah blah blah. This man’s wife is also 6 months pregnant and has other children by him. This is also a man significantly older than her so I’m sure he is very well aware of what he is doing.
The problem to me is that my friend says it’s just sex and she doesn’t really want much of anything from him except money and sex because they are just friends. I know she would like to believe its just sex I know it’s not and she’s setting herself up to get hurt. One of the previous guys I was involved with is trying to come back into my life. He’s feeling the distance and I know he misses me in general, but our relationship was just unhealthy to sum the whole thing up. I feel like I did the right thing by walking away even though it was very hard because of the sex. Sex will successfully complicate any situation if there is no true mutual understanding before the sex. We clearly had no mutual understanding at all just lots of passionate meaningless shagging, Once I walked away my mind was so much more clear and I could plainly see everything for what it was. (He is not married). When sleeping with married men sometimes those women don’t see things for what they are. Why would you sleep with a man who is lying to his own wife? If he is lying to his wife you have to know that he’s easily lying to you. Moreover this same friend always talks to me about how god will find her a good man and she’s just getting herself together in the time being. That is the same god that brought that man into that womans life. I find sleeping with a guy you’re not in a relationship with can lead to a huge problem but sleeping with a married man is just a crisis. I only feel bad because I already know where this is going and for my friend I feel like she’s setting herself up for some major bad karma. Being single does get lonely sometimes, but being lonely feels a whole lot better than being in an empty relationship with a married man. I want a boyfriend with no boundaries. A true bae. When I look at my life right now yes I’m single, but I’m 10x happier not worrying about what my “untitled sex partner who I wish were my boyfriend but won’t commit” is doing.
Karma is also a very real thing and history has a funny way of repeating itself. When bad things happen to people they blame the world and never look at what they may have possibly done for those bad things to occur. I’m just very disappointed in my friend. Of all the men you could have had sex with for money you choose a married friend who you says loves you, but I’m sure he loving more people than you. The sad thing is she can only blame herself and after all of this is all said and done she’s going to have to face that fact. Ladies it may seem harmless sleeping with a married man, but if you ever want to get married imagine how you would feel if your husband did what you are doing with someone else’s husband. And please don’t fall for a man who just shit talks his wife, because that is also another bad sign. That is the type of man who only want to use you whether you realize it or not. If he’s giving you money you have to decide if you’re satisfied with the way you are earning that money and if whatever he is giving you is even worth it. Don’t sell yourself short.
Ladies I’m going to end this one for you :). If you’re involved with a married man do the responsible thing and show yourself some respect you deserve better! You are worthy of true love. If you are a married woman and know that your husband is cheating you are in my heart and stay strong. You are also worthy of love and sometimes we have to distance ourselves from people for them to appreciate us and if you find that you are living a mentally healthier life without him then more power to you and even more power to you if you choose to fight for your marriage. Whoever you are I love you.