Getting My Chi Back

` I have big dreams of using my money to do something I really  want to do. I’ve been visualizing and speaking amazing things into the physical life.Ok anyway I smoked some weed yesterday and got too stoned and now I feel like I’m bored. Before I smoked the weed I was so stoked to just get everything done I want done, but then something changed and I want that feeling of complacency to go away. I feel like when you smoke weed its crazy how simple you see the world and you still realize how it complex it is as well. After smoking the weed I kind of have a “what’s the point” state of mind. Life is about change though and there is a point. There is also a  sense that all of your hard work has not gone unnoticed and that is very important. I’m stripping and if anyone deserves amazing things its me. rambles lol drunk rambles.

I guess I was just thrown way off of my schedule yesterday. I spent the night at my girlfriend’s other girlfriend’s house and we basically stayed up until 6 in the morning eating disgusting food , smoking too much weed and not having as intelligent conversationas I prefer. I like being at my house and waking up to my own routine. Her room was very dark which I guess is good to sleep in, but I  like to be awakened by sunlight and flowers so I can pop right up and feel refreshed. I can’t sleep in a room that makes me want to sleep in all day. So after I  left I tried to get back on track, and it was kinda hard, but I did what I could.I did a little work out at home, went to eat and basically went back to work. My friend and her friend actually didn’t even come to work and that’s a mess to me because we turned up kinda hard friday and didn’t even make the money we wanted so both of them should have been at work, but whatever I guess we’re all allowed an off day. If I didn’t go to work I would have felt very unproductive and especially since we were smoking weed until 6 in the morning and woke up smoking it too. I also feel like it is very important to mention that the other girl told us she snorted a line of coke and that’s just a hot flaming mess to me. How are you gonna go to work and snort coke with girls you don’t even know and then you turn around and miss work.

The girl also had some guys over which is ok and I don’t care because it is her house, but why are you entertaining one guy and have your other guy in the room waiting for you to come to bed. Neither one of them was giving us any money so f*ck them. I think her homeboy thought he was going to get some free entertainment because he was feeling  on my friend which she did not like, but didn’t say anything for some reason. She did however tell me that she wanted him to leave and I understand why. Like why the f*ck are you rubbing on her? What snsible grown man does that? And on top of that you didn’t give her any money and you know she’s a stripper thats very disrespectful, but then again she should have told him to stop. Bottom line just keep your hands to yourself unless you’re giving her money because this isn’t even the strip club at this point. My friend’s mom doesn’t know that she strips either and she wanted to chill so all of that extra stuff was annoying to her. I felt like I was with one of those strippers who take the lifestyle too seriously. I mean like who snorts coke at work girl c’mon. Even smoking weed is too much for me. I may smoke a little on my off time. but I’m not gonna be high at work. There comes a time where you have to put that foolish stuff behind you and handle your business at home. I also don’t have time to be in a daze all day.

I’m finally back on my good vibes tho! I’m at the park listening to music on my bluetooth speaker and writing. I’m also planning what I want to do for my birthday, my mom’s birthday which is 2 days before mine and my little cousin’s graduation because she’s the validictorian! I’m about to goto the mall with my friend and look for an outfit, a gift for my mom and think about what I want to get for my little cousin. This week is going to be very fun.

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